"Women like to be talked to. But if you go up to them and they don't like you or think you're attractive enough, they will call you a creep." — Jake.
Re-read that. A woman would call a perfectly normal and nice guy a creep just because he is not her type. And we wonder why men don't talk to women as much as they used to.
Roberto is 42 and single. He was asked why he didn't have the courage to talk to women. He replied, "A woman has never given me a clear sign." My female friends have told me that positive body language is a sign, but I'm not sure what it means.
Kane, who is 35 and single, says, "I don't talk to women anymore because it's too hard and doesn't pay off very often. Either they don't pay attention to you, reject you, put you down, or, worst of all, accuse you of molesting a child. If a woman likes me, she should try to find a way to talk to me."
Kevin, who is 57 and married, says, "Back then, if you didn't cold approach women, you'd be single. At that time, it was socially acceptable, and women knew how to tell a guy they were not interested in a nice way. That was how society worked, and I thought it was great for men. It gave us the confidence and courage to take chances in life. Today, online dating has killed this whole way of life. People rarely talk to each other in person anymore. Also, young men are becoming too girly. They don't know how to talk to women because more and more of them aren't sure what role they want to play. This can be hard for men to understand."
Mel, who is 29 years old, says, "You could call it "entitlement" when women want men to chase them but never go up to men themselves. I don't mean that women should start asking men out on dates, but it would be nice if they would just come up to us and talk. For women who want the same rights as men: "If he doesn't come to you, go to him."
Evi, who is 23 years old, says, "It's easier to meet women online and get a date than to just walk up to them." I'm in college right now, and 80% of the people on my campus are women. It's no longer necessary to talk to women." — Good for you Evi. Not everyone is as lucky as that, though.
Nathan, who is 22 years old, says, "It's mostly the bad things that could happen that are stopping me. It's scary to hear about guys on campus and false accusations against them. I put in a lot of effort to get into college. I'm not going to risk getting expelled for something I didn't do."
Matt, an AFA client who is 40 years old, says, "Western women aren't worth the drama. There's a reason why matchmaking services are going to other countries and why Western men are looking for wives in other countries.
How a woman answered
As a woman and a dating coach, I know what most men are going through. You're not sure what to do because you're afraid of being turned down or called a predator. And I agree that some women, especially in the West and especially in America, are rude, confusing, and bad. Thankfully, this is not the case with all women.
If only women were more clear with their signs, more direct and honest, less harsh when rejecting men, and stopped trying to be hard to get or playing with men's feelings.
Also, if men would stop bothering women in public, pay attention to the signs before approaching them, be smarter about how they act and what they say, and be less sexist, things would be better.
…
Our dating scene wouldn't be as complicated, hard, and dangerous.
How do you feel? Tell me in the comments below. Would love to hear what you think about it!
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